Loans R Boring

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Homes R Not

Every Monday I send 4 of the hottest, weirdest, most jaw-dropping homes in Utah straight to your inbox. No rates. No spreadsheets. Just pure real-estate eye candy.

Why would a mortgage guy start a site called Loans R Boring?

Because they are. I don't claim that loans are exciting; they’re often necessary but certainly not thrilling. Take this example: how often have you paused your TikTok scrolling to hear a mortgage expert explain the latest loan limits? That's probably a quick swipe up. See, boring!

Here’s What’s Inside My “Hot Homes Monday” Email

  • 4 hand-picked Utah homes that’ll make you pause your scroll

  • "Hopefully" - 1 bonus property that’s so weird you’ll text it to a friend

  • Quick notes on why each home stood out - maybe why it might work as an investment property

  • Occasional “behind-the-scenes” tips from me on how people actually get these homes funded fast

  • A $500 Hotel Savings Card just for joining the list today - no application needed, no purchase necessary

Meet the Guy Who Actually Admits Loans Are Boring

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🏡 About Me

’m Mike Acord, a Utah mortgage broker with Ultimate Home Lending. I don’t spam, and I don’t bore you with rates — because let’s be honest, nobody dreams about interest rates. They dream about kitchens that smell like Sunday breakfast, man caves that show off their toys, and patios with a 14-hour brisket smoking on the Traeger.

My real estate story started back in 1995 with a $46,000 split-entry in West Jordan. Since then, I’ve owned ten personal residences, a few rental properties, and seventy-plus finance contracts — mostly seller-financed deals. Along the way, I created a simple system called The 1-Page Investor to prove anyone can build wealth through real estate.

I’m a husband, dad, and grandpa who believes real estate is real-life Monopoly — the most rewarding game you can play, even in 2025 and beyond.

Every Monday, I share a newsletter that celebrates the fun part of real estate — and gently connects you with the guy who makes the boring part feel easy when the time’s right. NMLS 1326345 and NMLS 2259749

FAQ's

Do I have to buy anything?

No

Do I have to apply for a loan to get the hotel savings card?

No

Why do I have to validate my cell phone number?

Your hotel savings card is sent to you by text message and by email.

Are you gonna spam me with text messages?

No — I personally get 8–11 spam text messages a day and I hate them. I will only text you occasionally if needed (for example: customer updates or client appreciation events).

What is the catch?

No catch — loans are boring, homes are not. This is just a fun way to connect with you, show you some homes, talk about why they ended up on the email and maybe some ways to purchase them and when or if you ever need a loan, I’ll be here.

Fine Print Disclaimer:

The $500 Hotel Savings Card is a promotional gift provided with no strings attached and is fulfilled by our marketing partner, ReplicateU. No purchase, loan application, or financing commitment is required to receive or use this offer. This promotion is for marketing purposes only and is not a referral fee, settlement service incentive, or “thing of value” under Section 8 of RESPA. Offer valid while supplies last. NMLS 1326345 and NMLS 2259749